


Finding Locke

by killermochi



Category: Original Work
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Discrimination, Dom/sub Undertones, Forced Bonding, Forced Marriage, M/M, Omega Verse, Politics, Tags will be updated, dubcon
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-03-20
Packaged: 2018-09-23 10:12:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 17,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9651305
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/killermochi/pseuds/killermochi
Summary: Eight-year-old Ben watched the end of a failed omega equality movement with the fall of its great leader, Locke, on a television in his living room. Born into a line of alpha politicians, Ben swears one day he'll use his power to finish the movement Locke started. Locke's second revolution starts as a childish fantasy in his head, a secret desire to be the alpha hero for his omega mother.Ben must rethink his fairy tale when he presents as an omega and learns he doesn't have the luxury of traditional power to fight his revolution.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Just another amateur trying their hand at the omegaverse. Purely a project of bored passion, but obviously any comments, questions, concerns, reactions, etc. are appreciated. 
> 
> Warning: this chapter is all set up. The major characters will be 18 and older in the main story.

Ben remembered watching him on the TV, the slim figure in a dark blue suit and black tie, standing in front of the microphones and cameras. He was still too young then to really understand who the man was or what had brought the indignant, angry, sad expression on his face. He did know what it looked like after someone cried; puffy, watery eyes. But he hadn’t known that adults could cry. Especially not alphas.

The contradiction had prompted him to ask his mother how an alpha could be crying. Alphas oversaw everything, governments, businesses, families; they weren’t allowed to cry. Not when they grew up at least. Ben knew what the dark blue suit the man wore and the background of the grand hall signified. This man was important. He was from the government, a politician like his father and uncles, and their parents before them. Like he was destined to be one day.

His mother had bit her lip and tilted her head, the way adults so often do when speaking to children of things in the world too twisted for their innocent minds to comprehend.

“That’s Locke. He was the first omega elected to parliament, but now they are making him step down.”

Funny how the first thing that had clicked in his mind after his mother’s explanation was, ‘oh, that’s why an adult’s crying. It’s an omega.’ And then he saw what the suit had prevented him from seeing earlier, how the man stood a head shorter than those around him, how his tight, small frame contrasted against the broad shoulders of the men in the crowd.

Then, the second part of his mother’s words clicked.

“An omega in parliament?”

It didn’t make sense to him. He did vaguely recall his father grumbling about something like with his collogues at Sunday brunch or at the family dinner table with his uncles. About “that damn omega”. Even though he was from a family of politicians, at eight years old, politics still seemed like something happening in the confusing “grown-up” world; he thought he understood some of what he heard, but most things went way over his head.

He did know enough to understand that an omega in parliament was preposterous.

“Well then of course they’re kicking him out! Omegas don’t have jobs like father! They can’t be in charge of the government! They stay home and have kids!”

Ben started shouting, copying his father’s argumentative tone, and felt smart for a second, amid his ignorance.

And he had been sure his mother would agree with him, and pat his head like usual.

But when he turned to her, she was staring at the television screen, looking on at the omega in the suit. Tears streaked down her cheek.

“I guess you already know more than your mother Ben. I thought that maybe we could be in parliament. I thought that maybe this was the beginning of change for us.” She broke down to tears, hiding her face with her arms. “How stupid am I?”

Watching your mother cry is a gut-wrenching experience as a child. It’s terrifying because the center of your small world, your source of love and comfort, is suffering, but you lack the knowledge, the means to do anything about it.  Worse, it’s a peek into the reality that this person isn’t a smiling goddess, that the struggle and hurt you see isn’t an accident, but something always occurring behind the mask they wear before you.

Maybe that is why this moment stuck with Ben forever.

He’d never seen his mother be emotional before. She was a quiet, kind, loving, dutiful wife and mother. Ben dreamed of marrying a pretty omega just like his mother. He knew his mother was also smart. She read him books and answered all his questions.

The intricacies and politics of the dynamic-based society they lived in were still too complex for him to understand. He’d never questioned them before, or thought about the actual consequences.

It was only then, when he saw his mother cry, that Ben realized this society wasn’t right. That not everyone was like his father, that his mother wasn’t as blindly dutiful to her alpha as she appeared.

And so, like a stupid kid, who pretends to be the hero, Ben leaned over to drape his tiny arms around his mother and tried to apologize. “No Mom, they can actually! Omega’s can be in parliament! Even if father say’s no, I’m on your side.”

His mother turned up to smile at him though tear-stained eyes. She didn’t believe him, he could tell now. This was her adult smile.

“I will! When I become a politician like father, I’ll make change!” he swore with childish defiance and confidence.

Ben remembered his mother taking him in her arms then, laughing, warning him not to tell his father, reassuring him that she was okay. That was how that scene from his childhood ended, his mother trying to cover up, distract him away from the messy problems of real world. And for years, he did return back to the blissful ignorance of childhood, where his dynamic hadn’t presented yet, but he never forgot this moment, and in time it would come to mean much more than he might have imagined it would as a child.

* * *

 

Locke’s resignation from parliament marked the end of the failed omega equality movement. It was the end of a new chapter of history that never got to begin. Ben had witnessed it all on his TV screen at eight years old.

This history books told the tale of a lonely omega, wrongly isolated from the love and protection of an alpha. Locke had been raised by two beta parents and grown up in a household estranged from the dictates and culture of alpha, beta, omega dynamics. This is what allowed him to jump to the wild conclusions that omegas were entitled to equality and independence. Surrounded by the equal relationship between his beta parents, he mistakenly thought this would be ideal for alpha and omega relationships as well.

Of course, this was preposterous; omegas were small and weak, falling in to heat every month requiring the aid of their alphas while alphas were strong, with instincts to provide for and protect their mates. Alphas were meant to rule omegas, just as omegas were meant to serve alphas. It wasn’t difficult to understand. While beta couples could be independent of one another, alpha’s and omegas were interdependent. It was a concept even small children who hadn’t presented yet understood. Beta/beta couples couldn’t give birth to alphas, but could give birth to beta and omega children. In the case where they gave birth to an omega, recent legislation, inspired by Locke, required the parents to send their child to an omega educational institution to ensure their needs as an omega were provided.

Interestingly, Locke was framed not as a villain, but as the victim of unfortunate circumstances. His story, written by alphas, ended not in a tragic downfall, but in a happily ever after romantic fashion.

Locke had acquired his seat in parliament after years of speeches, demonstrations, and marches. He’d built a network of contacts among betas, omegas, and even alphas, using each new ounce of influence to further the omega cause. He was a voracious reader and talented writer. Even before the omega movement surfaced, Locke was publishing articles online, submitting opinions to papers, arguing in forums. But all the raw talent and drive in the world couldn’t get an omega very far by themselves. Locke wasn’t the only omega bickering about inequality anonymously behind keyboards. It was an alpha who had pushed Locke’s movement out of the woodwork and into reality.

Locke’s childhood friend and ally, Theo, was the son of omega and beta parents, one of the rarest, most stigmatized couplings. Omega and alpha coupling was hailed as the ideal choice for alphas and omegas because of its two thirds chance of alpha offspring (one third chance of omega offspring). Betas were encouraged to mate with betas, which, again, could produce omega or beta offspring. The alpha/beta pairing, which was less encouraged, but not looked down upon, also held a fifty/fifty chance of omega or beta offspring. In contrast, most omega and beta pairs were infertile, but when children were produced they were most likely to be alpha, with a slight chance of beta.

In this way, Theo’s parental background was used to make him the second victim of unfortunate circumstances in Locke’s story. Theo, as an alpha could attend all the best schools and gain access to the best information and reach the alpha-run ladders of influence in government and industry. It was only through Theo that Locke had been able to enter into the political realm. He’d needed an alpha to open the door.

But Theo’s role didn’t end as the doorman standing outside of Locke’s failed revolution. He actually, in a sick twist of fate, became the hero of the story.

After half a year serving in parliament, the leader of the omega equality movement, known just as Locke, publicly stepped down in the middle of his term. His mate, whom as his alpha had the right, by law, to dictate where, when, and if he worked, had ordered him to resign.

The words in the history books said that Theo and Locke had both finally realized what they’d been denying themselves from, the happiness and joy only attained by the pure alpha and omega bond. Theo hadn’t been able to bear it any longer, seeing Locke, an omega meant to be protected and pampered, struggle in the cruel alpha world.

Theo was quoted saying he’d “been in love with Locke since childhood” and that he’d “known that they were mates for years”. Long interviews detail how Theo was aware of the misguided nature of Locke’s campaigns, but that he was “too afraid of losing him” or “content just to be by his side”. At least he'd thought he'd been, until Locke’s movement became increasingly more drastic. Then Theo had known he could no longer allow Locke to play alpha and deny his omega dynamic. After a rough debate in parliament one day, “Locke collapsed from exhaustion on the stairs” and “cried” in his arms when he picked him up. At that moment, Theo knew he couldn’t let it continue. “Long story short”, he got down on one knee and proposed. He claimed Locke that night and completed the official marriage contract in the morning. The next afternoon the formal paperwork ordering the release of an omega spouse from the workplace was filed.

The newspapers and history books portrayed it as a happily-ever-after. Locke was weak and weary, standing on the parliament floor at his resignation. The alpha realm demanded a stamina and emotional strength that omegas simply didn’t possess. the tole the years of useless fighting had taken on poor Locke was evident in his tear streaked face and tired eyes as he stood at the podium. Some of the tears, many suggested, were from relief of being freed of his load, of having an alpha who would love and care for him.

But Ben remembered the Locke from the TV that day. Maybe he’d been too young at the time to really know what was happening, but he knew enough just from the face projected on the screen. It hadn’t been a weary face, and the tears definitely had not been those of relief. Locke had been furious that day. Those had been tears of anger and righteous indignation, and nothing less.

The brief omega rights movement ten years ago made the new editions of history books. It was recorded, documented in journals and newspapers. But Ben saw how they twisted it, molded it to tell the truths they wanted, uphold the society that they ruled. Alphas. The Government. His father.

They’d made the death of freedom into the love story of the decade. A traitor into a hero.

Theo rose as a member of parliament, taking his mate’s place. Locke made public appearances, with Theo always at his side, holding his hand, arm around his waist. They had three children, two alphas and one omega. Locke raised them lovingly and dutifully. The family was featured on magazine covers. The two older brothers, alphas, were expected to do great things. The omega girl, at five years old, was already blooming into a beauty matching to the handsomeness of her parents.

Of course, the press and the government didn’t expect everyone to buy the story at once. Their intentions were much crueler than that. The majority, who had never become involved with the omega rights movement or who had directly opposed it, got a guiltless conclusion and seamless return to the norm.

Locke’s framed narrative sent a different message to his followers. A threat, a promise of crushing defeat. Not only will you fail, but you will be silenced, your words turned into whatever we want them to be. Locke didn’t get to be a martyr. They made him the damsel in distress, doomed to kneel to and kiss the feet of his knight-in-shining armor for the rest of his days, to appear grateful to the man who destroyed him.

* * *

 

At eight years old, Ben hadn’t known the whole story. He would read about it later and hear about it on TV and talks at the dinner table. But no matter how happy everyone tried to make it seem, all Ben could do was recall his mother’s crying face and his foolish boyhood promise to her.

It was a secret that he kept from the world, from his father, from his little brother, from his friends at school. Even from his mother. The secret that he would one day finish what Locke started once he took his place in parliament.

Ben had known he would be a politician from birth. He came from a line of politicians on both sides. Almost all the alpha males in his family served in parliament or local legislatures. The remaining were judges and lawyers. High families like his were strictly comprised of alpha and omega pairs. Alphas could only be male, and the alpha/omega pair produced a two-thirds chance of begetting an alpha, so it was tradition to start grooming male children to take on the family political business from early on.

This meant that Ben attended the best schools, with tutors to oversee his dedication to his studies at home. His father signed him up for all the sports teams and made him attend every public social event. The latter was his least favorite.  It was as if his father was assigning him to make friends—except it wasn’t as if, because this was literally what happened. He was told to play with certain boys from certain families of influence, either to expand his family’s political network or to build up future allies for himself. Sometimes he was pushed in front of girls or older boys who’d presented as omegas as their parents laughed in the background, whispering about what lovely couple they would make.

The pressure placed on him by his father was immense for a child, but Ben managed to fulfil most of his expectations without too much trouble. It wasn’t so bad, because, he knew, he wasn’t living life for his father’s approval. In the end, he couldn’t, since he would have to go against his father at one point. It was odd, his secret, and the distance it put between him and his father that his father wasn’t even aware of. It was stupid, how Ben already thought of himself as so special, without having done anything yet.

After that day in front the television, Ben began to observe his mother more carefully. Nothing changed in how she treated him and his brother Fin. She was just as lovely as always. But at the dinner table he could sense it, the tension between his mother and father. And Ben wasn’t sure if the development was new, or if it had always been there and had just gone unnoticed, undetected by his carefree childish self.

His mother spent much of her time at home reading and writing. She had a bookshelf in the living room filled with all sorts of books. Omega’s weren’t denied education, as it was important in raising children. However, there was a limit placed on an omega’s ambition for knowledge, as too much education was deemed dangerous and unnecessary. After presenting, omegas were sent to separate educational facilities where they would complete middle school through high school. If they wished to continue studies, there were courses offered at omega community centers they could get permission to attend. All teachers were alphas and betas. Certain professions were still open to omegas, but now permission from a mate or family member was required to work. At the height of the omega equality movement, omegas had been able to enter into most professions freely, while the law allowing mates to force their retirement had never been gotten rid of (unfortunately). Ben’s mother often went to the omega center while Ben and his brother were at sports practices.

When his father was home, she never read or sat at the computer.

One night, Ben’s mother didn’t come to dinner. His father ate with them in almost complete silence, expect to urge them to clean their plates. The next day, the computer in the study was gone. His mother no longer accompanied him and his brother to sports games and practices.

Of course, Ben wondered what had happened, but he knew he couldn’t ask or change anything. Not yet. Fin remained blissfully unaware. His brother was only two years younger, but at the time that felt like all the difference. Ben saw himself as a sage next to the pipsqueak. Stupid little kid, climbing onto mom’s lap, jumping on to dad’s back, grabbing both of their hands like they were one big happy family. Couldn’t he see the way they looked at each other? Mother’s silent resentment? Father’s longing, desperate glances?

Ben saw himself on his mother’s side in whatever had occurred between his parents, as he had decided to be after that day, but he also couldn’t bring himself to hate his father. Ben didn’t think all the things they taught about the bond between alphas and omegas was a lie. Alphas were especially sensitive to the bond, leading to possessive, controlling tendencies over their claimed omega, a constant need for reassurance when the bond was challenged. In return, omegas were dependent on alpha’s during their heats.

Every once in a while, when his father looked at his mother, the desperation showed in full. His father touched his mother more, especially in public. On the other hand, when Ben’s mother was absent, his father’s expression was colder and sterner than ever. His mother always played her role though, there were fights between her and his father in private, Ben was sure, but she never let it show.  

Watching his parents pushed Ben into another resolution. He would marry an intelligent, ambitious omega, like his mother, and they would be partners in his omega equality movement. It would be like Locke and Theo revamped, except he wouldn’t become a traitor like Theo. It was just another fantasy he entertained in his mind, except, being a foolish child, he took it very seriously at the time.

* * *

 

At eleven years old, two years before he would present his dynamic, and three years after the fall of Locke, Ben met who he thought was his soulmate at a celebratory social gathering for one of his uncles campaigns.

She was a year younger than him, the daughter of an important member of parliament, Allen Blackwell, a colleague of his fathers, who his father likely wanted to get closer with, guessing by the way he’d been deliberately pushed in front of her and introduced with that telling smile.

She introduced herself in the same graceful manner most omega girls of her station would. She hadn’t technically presented, she was ten, but because alphas could only be male and her parents were an alpha omega pair, there was no chance of her being anything else. On the contrary, if she did end up being beta, she and her family would be disgraced. The likes of that had happened before.

What drew him to her happened after the adults left them to play by themselves, the point where Ben would usually make an excuse and leave to eat cake.

“My father says I should marry you.” She cut directly to the point. Ben knew other kids were probably aware of their parents’ intentions, but no one had talked about it openly before. He was caught off guard, and answered without thinking.

“I can’t marry you, I’m going to marry Locke.”

He wanted to hit himself. What a stupid thing to say. Locke was already married…he obviously hadn’t meant the real Locke, he’d meant his Locke, but that was a secret. Now he’d have to make up an excuse for the answer.

“I mean…I” he started mumbling.

“I could be your Locke.” She cut him off, eyes wide, intrigued. “My omega dad read some of his stuff to me and my brother online once. He won’t anymore. Father hates him. But I think he’s cool.”

Ben hesitated. Did this girl understand his plan? He narrowed his eyes, deciding to test her. He made sure to keep the volume down, because this was not the kind of conversation you wanted to be caught having.

“Do you even know who Locke is? Do you know what it would mean to be Locke?” he continued, “When I say Locke, I don’t mean Theo’s Locke, I mean Locke’s Locke.” As if that made sense.

She puffed her cheeks in annoyance “Don’t talk to me like I’m stupid. I know what you mean. You want a super smart omega who fights for equality for all. That’s me! I told my father I would, but he didn’t believe me. He doesn’t think I’ll be able to get married, so he’s mad at my omega dad a lot for ‘influencing me’.”

It took a while for Ben to wrap his head around all this girl was saying. He’d never met such an outspoken omega before. He was the one left stumbling for words.

“Um Sorry, what was your name? I wasn’t paying attention before.” He scratched his head nervously.

“I’m Anabelle. Anabelle Blackwell,” she stuck her hand out and Ben reluctantly took it.

Grabbing her hand, feeling the physical warmth of her touch for the first time threw him into the realization; it was no longer a secret, it was no longer a childish fantasy in his head. This was his Locke. This was where it began.

“I’m Ben.”

She looked at him curiously, “I know, loser, I was paying attention. I always am.” She paused. “Do you really want to marry me? Already, just like that? Your only eleven and I’m ten. Plus, you don’t really get to decide, do you. I know I don’t.”

Something in all of Anabelle’s doubt made Ben more confident.

“Yes. You’re going to be my Locke. And marriages get decided earlier than this. Some of my cousins younger than me are already engaged. I can convince my father, he probably wants us to get married anyway.”

It should’ve sounded more stupid, a ten-year-old and an eleven-year-old talking about marriage. Like they knew what it meant. Or what sex was or the bond between alphas and omegas. Neither of them had even presented yet, and they were already plotting marriage and political takeover. Even if adults could overhear them, they’d probably just burst out laughing.

Ben and Anabelle spent the whole afternoon talking, about all sorts of things, not just their marriage. Every so often a parent would check up on them and give them endearing looks. Ben knew they were picturing them as a couple, and for once, he didn’t mind, because it played right into his hands.

Eventually the event came marching to a close, and the guests began to empty out of the venue as food and drink disappeared from the tables.

Only a few dozen people remained when Anabelle’s father came to collect her.

“Come along Anabelle, I’m sure you’ll be seeing more of Ben here soon.” Her father held out a hand to pick her up off the grass, where she and Ben had been sitting together. Ben stood up to say farewell to Anabelle and her father, then froze when he noticed another figure at Mr. Blackwell’s side.

A boy. Tall, with pale skin and dark features similar to Anabelle’s.

And he was staring at Ben with such intensity that he began to doubt that he hadn’t done something terrible, accidently wronged this stranger within the few seconds of their meeting.

Mr. Blackwell seemed to notice Ben’s eyes trailing on the boy beside him.

“Oh, this is my son, Kai. He’s two years older than you-just presented as alpha a few weeks ago. I meant to introduce you to him earlier. I’m sure you two will become great friends and colleagues in the future.” He placed his hands on Kai’s shoulders, smiling proudly, “Kai here also has an interest in politics.”

Somewhere in his father’s introduction the intensity faded from Kai’s eyes. Ben still felt overly scrutinized by the boy’s measured, neutral expression, but he managed to fight the instinct to shrink away, extending his hand in polite gesture.

He disagreed with Mr. Blackwell. Anabelle’s brother or no, he didn’t think he and this boy would ever be friends.

“Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you.”

They touched for the first time.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Uh so, haha, the main characters are still younger in this chapter...
> 
> There was more to write than I had originally thought. Estimate of one more chapter of intro. Just want to be clear that it won't continue at this pace forever--I was really encouraged by how many people read the first chapter (I assumed that an original work would get like two views), and I don't want to bore you all away!

Ben grew to hate the sports his father forced him to play. His hatred concentrated mainly on soccer, the most important sport of the elite circles. At first his father and uncles had been content to just watch him kick the ball around. Once he hit twelve, they started expecting him to win.

The pressure was immense, and not just for him, but for everyone. Ben doubted any one of the players his own or any other team still enjoyed the game. It had become a vicious, competitive spectacle. Why parents were so obsessed with soccer baffled Ben, as it had no ostensible connection to business or politics. He tried to explain this to his father several times, but never got through. Even Anabelle only half listened to his complaints when he visited.

“I wish I could play soccer. I get yelled at for doing pushups on my bedroom floor.”

It annoyed him sometimes, when she made no attempt to sympathize, but he also understood how blessed he was to get to play sports or any physical activities for that matter. Part of his hatred, he reluctantly admitted to himself, also sprung form a new insecurity; the fact that he couldn’t meet his family’s expectations. He was bad at soccer. He wasn’t strong or fast. His legs weren’t as long or muscular as his team mates or the boys he played against, even the ones his own age. The league was made up of twelve to fifteen-year-olds.

At the same time, the idea of setting time aside from Anabelle or his studies to train for soccer, a sport he found ultimately worthless, seemed ridiculous. Instead, the negative attention from his father make him reject soccer further. If he didn’t make any effort, he couldn’t really fail. If he tried, he could potentially be as good as the others.

Despite his lackluster play and overall hatred of the sport, Ben’s father hadn’t allowed him to quit until a certain incident.

* * *

The spring soccer season had just begun. It was the second game of the year and Ben’s team, the Yellow Tigers, were playing the Purple Foxes, their “rival team”, he was told. As if it meant anything to him.

It had just hit half time, and they were losing, down by two goals. Ben still hadn’t touched the ball.

Walking off the field, his father pulled him aside, making of show of handing his son a water bottle. Ben stared down at the grass, refusing to make eye contact when his father knelt down to match his level, the way adults pretending to be nice do.

“Ben, make some effort, please,” his father scolded, “Anabelle’s brother on the Red Foxes is the star of his team. I honestly don’t know what to do anymore, since you clearly don’t care. At least make one goal, for the love of god.” He was clearly exasperated with him. “Do you think your uncles and I take time off work to watch you stand on a field?” his father sighed angrily when Ben kept silent, then ended in a threat, “If you don’t score today, you’re apologizing to each and every person who came here to watch you, understood?”

Ben hated his father then. And soccer. And everything. And Anabelle’s brother.

“Do you understand?” the man repeated, forcing an answer, making Ben look deeper into the grass.

“Yes” he answered weakly, and his father let him go eat orange slices.

This time, Ben sensed, his father was sincerely upset with him. It wouldn’t be the first time he’d faced his father’s anger, but Ben couldn’t deny that he was afraid of the consequences of displeasing the patriarch. Would he really make him do that? Apologize? Punish him so publicly? Alphas took such matters of pride very seriously.

The usual pressure had doubled, and the second half started in just a few minutes. Ben’s hands were shaking, holding an orange slice.

A whistle blew and he was ushered back onto the field.

A mix of fear and adrenaline spurred him into action. Ben needed to score somehow. He’d been slacking in training for a while now. There was no muscle memory, no skill he could rely on. Determination was the only thing on his side. And children know that desire and passion can win over everything else.

The problem, Ben soon realized, was getting his teammates to pass to him.

He made a point to run along with the forwards whenever they moved in towards the goal and send signals for a pass. Everyone was a total ball hog though, and boys would only pass if there was no other option.

When a large defender had one of his teammates with the ball blocked, Ben quickly secured the perfect positon in a free space with a good angle towards the goal.

“Pass! Over here!”

The boy looked his way for maybe a second before kicking the ball backwards to another teammate.

More than the hurt of the instant rejection, Ben felt embarrassed. Embarrassed for calling out at all, angry at his teammate for ignoring him so easily, even if he was the worst on the team.

Angered, he resolved to steal the ball himself and make a goal without the help of his teammates.

Ben ran, abandoning his set position, the next time the Red Foxes took the ball.

Down the field, he fixated on the red jersey sprinting towards the Yellow Tiger’s goal.

The player moved with swiftness and accuracy, maneuvering past defenders with a graceful footwork, a cool focus that Ben secretly resented. Anabelle’s brother. The Blackwell’s golden boy, envy of every father in Parliament.

All he did was hog the ball and show off at soccer, and he was two years older. Why did father always have to compare them. It annoyed Ben to no end. He was the brother of his betrothed, it wasn’t as if he’d ever be a threat, or if it would matter who was better at soccer.

Of course It had to be him that Ben had to face in order to win his father’s approval.

The identification of his opponent provided him a new burst of energy. Ben ran at full speed in a rush to close the gap between them.

But the gap between them stubbornly refused to close. Kai was unforgivingly fast. Ben’s teammates slowed to pattering jogs, some stopping to rest their hands on their knees.

Just as Ben felt his lungs about to give as well though, Kai seemed to slow down.

He didn’t hesitate to take initiative. Ben ignored his aching legs and heaving lungs and caught up in a sprint; the two of them were shoulder by shoulder.

The older boy acknowledged the new presence at his side with a flicker of his eyes.

Ben scowled.

With messy footwork, he started a volley of attempts to kick at the ball, making jabs with his legs. Kai countered every attack easily, but was still somehow unable to shake him off. Their shoulders touched as they ran down the field, neck and neck.

Ben could hear his father and uncles shouting for him in the background.

That was when he made a particularly daring move, shifting the weight to his foot at a sudden, pinpointed angle on the soccer ball. But the ball disappeared before the kick could land; Ben stumbled, almost fell, then recovered footing awkwardly, twisting his ankle a bit.

He might’ve flinched in pain, but he pushed though, going in for another kick almost immediately. But the ball wasn’t where it should be.

Kai had stopped running two steps before, the ball under his foot, trapped beneath his cleats.

Ben, caught mid-run, was struck with confusion. A fake out? But he turned, stepped back, and made another grab for the ball.

Kai watched him approach, deliberate, thoughtful.

“You want the ball?” he asked.

His tone was neither mocking or sarcastic. It was as if he was truly asking this question, making this offer in the middle of a soccer game. It was as if he’d really just hand it over if Ben said yes.

What was this casual pity? It sent a rush of hot blood to his head.

“No, I’m just going to take it,” Ben gritted out, lunging at the ball.

He managed to almost touch it before Kai tapped it out of reach at the last second, flashing a smile for the first time.

“No, you’ll only ever get it if I give it to you.”

* * *

They left the game immediately, his father predictably furious.

“Honestly what were you thinking? Tackling the Blackwell boy like that? I don’t know what came over you, but you should be ashamed. And then hitting him even though he didn’t retaliate? Kai’s two years older than you and a head taller. He let you hit him and didn’t hit you back. You were disgraceful today.” And lastly, “What will you tell sweet Anabelle?”

Ben regretted letting Kai set him off. He could hardly defend his actions to his father, he’d already tried, but no matter what spin you put on it, it just looked like an insecure alpha losing his cool. It didn’t help that his father took no responsibility for pressuring him. 

Following the whole soccer incident, Ben was politely dismissed from the team. It was a stain on the family record, but not as bad, or surprising, as one might think. Alphas were quick to get aggressive, so a fight during a sports match wasn’t too rare of an occurrence. Some of Ben’s uncles sympathized with him by recalling their own stories.

He had been sent over to the Blackwell’s the following day to formally apologize. Standing in front of Kai and Mr. Blackwell, bowing his head, was a humiliating memory. He didn’t mean it, he’d wanted to shout in Kai’s face, but he’d managed to choke out an acceptable apology. Kai had just smiled, in the mature way adults do, even though he was only fourteen, not even two years older, since Ben had a birthday coming up.

“No worries.” He had said.

After the ordeal, Ben had run away to play with Anabelle in the house.

Ben and Anabelle had been officially betrothed since before Ben’s twelfth birthday celebration. Being that neither of them had presented yet, the official courting had yet to begin, but their parents allowed them to meet casually to spend time together. Once Ben presented on his thirteenth birthday, If they weren’t officially betrothed, the strict rules between dynamics would be enforced, and he’d no longer be able to meet Anabelle in private settings without heavy supervision. Maybe the betrothal had been a bit sudden, but it was a necessary precaution to their relationship, Ben and Anabelle had concluded.

It was difficult to ascertain how their families viewed their relationship. Of course they approved, or else they would have never been able to get betrothed, but in retrospect, it was hard to believe Ben and Anabelle could have appeared to be anything more than two children playing house.

Ben’s parents and Fin constantly teased him about Anabelle. Mr. Blackwell seemed delighted by their betrothal. Anabelle’s brother wasn’t around much, busy with studies, preparing to succeed his father as the Blackwell’s only alpha son. Ben couldn’t begrudge the fact that he was cordial whenever they did cross paths though; he would always offer a greeting or comment on whatever he and Anabelle were up to. Even now, after the fight on the soccer field, Kai continued to be amiable, like nothing had ever happened.

Ben brought it up to Anabelle one day at her house while they browsed around on the computer in her study.

“I hate how he does that, treats me like a kid, you know? ‘like it’s okay you punched me, you’re just a kid who didn’t know any better’. It’s like I’m not a _threat_ , you know?”

Anabelle took a moment to consider his words. She wasn’t one to hesitate from shouting out the first thing on her mind, but she also liked to consider things fully before forming an opinion.

“Hm. It’s interesting how you worded that. ‘threat’. Why would you want to be a threat to my brother?” she posed the question neutrally, adding, “And you are a kid. I am too. Neither of us have presented yet.”

Anabelle wasn’t giving him the validation he’d been seeking.

“I guess it’s an alpha thing,” Ben said, and instantly regretted it. It was exactly the sort of thing the ‘typical alpha’ he swore not to become would say.  

“Oh? Is that why you punched my brother, and kept punching him, even though he didn’t punch back?” Her tone was still level, but she was clearly ignited.

Ben tried to backpedal out, “I told you that was an accident. I lost control and blew up okay…Sorry. I didn’t mean the alpha thing like that. I meant that, you know, it’s a pride thing.” He tried to clarify. He hadn’t intended to offend.

Anabelle met his eyes and tilted her head in a thoughtful gesture, “Do Omegas not have pride?”

The question was a challenge. She was twisting his words, making this about omegas when Ben was just trying to vent about Kai. Omega’s should have equal rights, but alphas and omegas were fundamentally different. Ben wanted to explain all the pressure that came with being an alpha, the pressure to protect your pride, the pressure to be successful, how these were natural, instinctual things. But at the last second, before opening his mouth, he decided he’d rather just save himself from the argument.

“Of course they do,” he answered. He scratched his head, trying to lighten the mood, “Sorry. I guess I’m just not doing a good job of getting along with my brother-in-law haha.”

Anabelle seemed to accept the acquiesce.  

“Well, he’s never around anyway, so it shouldn’t really matter. But maybe you should start sucking up to him, you know, to build up your political influence. Father wants you to be allies in parliament, remember?” She laughed.

But the contents of what she’d said made Ben think about the nature of Anabelle and Kai’s relationship. While Kai had been groomed as an alpha from birth, Anabelle had been raised as an omega. They’d been brought up in completely different environments while sharing the same house. And it was true, also, that in the future, Ben would likely see more of Kai than Anabelle would—depending on how fast he acted on his plans in parliament.

Then another thought struck him. Anabelle’s omega dad had been a secret Locke supporter. She’d mentioned that he’d read Locke to her and her brother. Could that mean that maybe Kai could be an Omega rights supporter too? It was difficult to picture—he almost didn’t want it to be true, given his growing ulterior dislike for the guy.

He reluctantly decided to ask.

“What does Kai think of Locke? He wants to be a politician, so he should have some opinion right?”

Anabelle paused.

“I don’t really know. My father and him don’t talk about that stuff around omegas. I mean, now that I’m presenting in a year, everyone’s gotten so strict. I’m sure my father would throw a fit if he saw me reading the intro to political science book you snuck me last time.”

Ben hadn’t really thought about that, but then remembered the arguments he’d overheard between his mother and father and was silently convinced. Higher learning, like economics and politics, was becoming a more and more discouraged subject for omegas. A few months ago he and Anabelle had created a separate archive of Locke’s writings on the computer. It might be a good thing to print them, he thought, in case she got it taken away, like his mother had.

Anabelle spoke about it all so casually, like it was so normal, that Ben sometimes forgot to sympathize.

“You know when we bond that none of that will matter right? I won’t take books from you. I’ll give you all my books. I’ll approve your attendance for the best omega schools—even if that’s not enough. I’ll teach you everything I learn at my school. So--”

He was cut off by the sudden touch of her lips on his.

His first kiss. His eyes were wide open like an idiot.

When they broke apart Anabelle smiled while he tried desperately to hide a blush.

He was embarrassed, a twelve-year-old kid, almost thirteen, talking big—but he also felt a rush of determination, and leaned in again to kiss Anabelle’s forehead.

This was his Locke, he thought.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for Reading! Any feedback is appreciated :]  
> Apologize for poorly written sports/action scenes--literally don't know what I was doing :/


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> All of your comments and kudos have been so encouraging :]  
> We're still stuck in this never-ending set up. Sorry guys. Will work on ending it soon.
> 
> Brief note about mating in this omega verse for those who are interested:  
> *all alphas are male  
> beta+beta pairs:beta or omega offspring  
> beta+alpha pairs:beta or omega offspring (high chance male omega)  
> beta+omega pairs:beta or alpha offspring  
> alpha+omega pairs: alpha or omega offspring (high chance of alpha over omega)(high chance of female omega)
> 
> Obviously, this is all just made up, but it does kind of matter for the story to make sense, so thought I'd clarify :]

“Today you become an alpha son.”

The words his father had spoken to him as they left for the registration center on the morning of his thirteenth birthday.

Ben was less excited than he’d imagined. The whole thing seemed so procedural and de jure; he just wanted to get the blood tests and paperwork over with so he could return home and celebrate. His mother had a delicious-looking cake in the oven.

All orientations presented at the thirteenth year. Everyone was required to undergo a blood drawing at local government centers to confirm their orientation and officially register into the system as alpha, beta, or omega. Ben wasn’t a fan of needles, but the thought of waiting in line is what really dampened his mood. He silently hoped there weren’t too many other kids who shared his birthday. Lines were the worst.

The chauffeur dropped him and his father off in front of the building by the entrance. They walked right in and up to the reception desk. A quick look around the room revealed, to Ben’s relief, that there were only a few people waiting. His father had been right in deciding to leave so early in the morning.

“Good morning. I’m here with my son, Benjamin Woodhull for his orientation test and registration.”

The, probably beta, woman at the desk rapid-fired on her keyboard before addressing them with a business-like smile.

“Ah, yes, I have his file right here. Happy Birthday.” She looked down to offer perfunctory congratulations.  “If you’ll just fill out these forms, a doctor will be with you momentarily.”

Ben’s father was handed a clipboard and Ben sat down, aimlessly flipping through magazines while his father filled everything out.

It wasn’t too long before he heard his name called.

“Benjamin Woodhull. The doctor is ready for you.”

Ben dropped what he’d been reading and made his way to the partition between the waiting room and the actual facilities where a man in a while coat stood to greet him and his father. It was all so typical, exactly like every other doctor’s appointment Ben had ever had.

“Hello, I’m Dr. Franklin, and I’ll be the doctor conducting your blood test today. If you’ll just follow me, hopefully we can get this over with in a jiffy.”

Ben glared at the back of Dr. Franklin’s white coat as they followed him into his office, all too wary that this was the guy who’d be stabbing a needle into his arm in a moment. 

They entered the office and the doctor directed Ben to sit on the table. Ben’s father sat in a chair off to the side.

“Please make yourself comfortable. If you could just roll up your sleeve for me.”

Ben did as he was told. He tried not to flinch when the needle was brought up to his arm. He was an alpha now, so he couldn’t be afraid of things like needles anymore.

All in all, it wasn’t so bad though.  It took a minute or so before the right amount of blood was drawn. Dr. Franklin wiped off the affected area and stuck a band aid on it.

“Well, now that’s done. Please wait patiently while I hop over to deliver your blood sample to testing. The results should be out in a few minutes, and then you can go get officially registered.”

“Thank you.” Ben replied politely.

Dr. Franklin left and Ben slid off the table back on to his feet.

“Ugh I’m so bored. I wish we could do this some other time—like not on my birthday.”

His father tsked at his complaint, legs crossed in his chair. “Be patient Ben. It’s almost over.”

“I know.” Ben huffed and sat back down on the table.

* * *

 

Ten minutes later, when Dr. Franklin re-entered the room, his entire demeanor had changed. Behind him stood three figures in black suits. A clipboard at his side, his face no longer held the air of professional confidence it had before. He looked shaken, hesitant, afraid.

Ben didn’t know how to react to the sudden tension.

The chair clanked in the corner as his father stood up abruptly.

“Don’t tell me.”

His father’s voice was weak. His expression dire. Ben observed his father’s out of character responses questioningly from his positon between him and the doorway.

But it was only a moment until he understood.

“We’re sorry Mr. Woodhull. This is truly rare occurrence, and we know it’s impossible to prepare for, but the facility has a number of services available to help with the transition. Your son presented as omega.”

* * *

 

 His world had shattered.

The stream of explanations and reassurances went by like a blur. Ben nodded blankly when words were directed his way. The doctors and staff didn’t talk to him much, addressing his father now instead. Things proceeded around him.

Sympathetic glances.

His father hugged him for the first time in a while.

When they arrived back home there was no cake. His mother rushed to embrace him, clutching him in her arms, his father frozen awkwardly in the doorway.

“Claretta, I--”

She held him tighter. He could feel her glaring at his father over his shoulder.

And Ben was finally able to cry, his head pressed into his mother’s chest.

He had a sense of what his mother had been feeling at that moment. The realization that her child would suffer. The suffering she’d hoped he’d never know. The desire to protect him from it. Blame for those who would cause it.   

“My sweet Benjamin, it’s all going to be okay.” She whispered, lightly mussing his hair.

“No it’s not! I can’t be an omega—my future! School! Anabelle! Mom--”

“Shhh,” she tried to calm him, “This is all so sudden for you, and we can talk more later, but why don’t you go rest first? You’ll feel better after some time.”

“I’m never going to feel better!”

Ben’s father, a silent observer until now, finally chimed in when Ben shouted at his mother.

“Ben, this has been a rough day, and neither of us were prepared for it, but that’s no excuse to yell at your mother. I failed you as a father, I never thought this was a possibility--male omegas from alpha omega pairs are so rare—but these things do happen. There will be a lot of changes from now on. Me and Clare—your mother and your brother are going to help you through everything.” He looked to Ben’s mother. “We’ll do everything we can. So do as your mother says and get some rest.”   

* * *

 

Rest brought him escape, but no peace.

Ben saw no reason to leave his room ever again.

He found himself overwhelmed by his new reality, his mind spun, unsure how to feel. There was shock and disbelief. This couldn’t be happening. He wasn’t prepared for this. There was profound sadness and disappointment.  He broke into tears, shaking in his covers. And there was fear. Fear of everything there was to be afraid of.

Ben struggled to avoid thinking. Actually thinking about what being an omega would mean—the rules and restrictions, the biological phenomena, prospects for education, prospects for marriage—only left him in a downward spiral of terrified despair.

For days he shut himself up in his room. 

His mother took care of him, bringing him meals offering comfort in ways she could. She seemed to understand that her son needed time to deal with this new turn of events.

Of course, there were some things that couldn’t wait. She’d told him he’d been transferred out of school, that they’d figure out a new path for him as soon as possible. She’d also placed a pill box on his bedside table with the necessary explanation.

The pillbox’s presence at his bedside was a constant reminder, pulling him out of his efforts to disconnect each time it entered his field of sight. Suppressants; standard pills prescribed to omegas in order to suppress heats. Ben would have heats now. The pill he now swallowed every morning chained him to that fact, and foiled any attempt to escape reality.

* * *

 

 After two weeks or so, Ben had stopped counting days, his brother Fin poked his head through his door one morning.

Ben hadn’t seen anyone but his mother since his birthday. His father, he presumed, was back to his busy work schedule, and Fin was too focused on his studies to check in. That was fine though; it wasn’t as if he wanted to see either of them. Ben was content in his secluded corner of the world.

Or had been, until now.

“Go away. I don’t feel like talking right now.”

Fin didn’t even pretend to listen, proceeding to walk right in.

“I just wanted to check in on you,” he said, hesitantly stepping closer.

“I don’t care! Like I’d want to talk to a pipsqueak like you!”

Ben threw a pillow, hoping to ward him away.

He was so annoying. Stupid kid. Why would he think he’d want to see him, like he could have any idea what he was going through.

But Fin stayed despite Ben’s obvious displeasure, sitting down on a chair near the bed. Ben sighed in defeat, realizing his brother wasn’t going to leave.

Frustrated, he turned to his brother with a sneer.

“What exactly do you have to say? Were you surprised to hear about your omega big brother? Hah, I bet your ecstatic!”

Now that Ben was out of the picture, Fin would be named the new alpha heir. Really, the entire situation was ideal for him.

Fin raised his brow in concern.

“Huh? Why would I be ecstatic…I don’t like that your sad…I just want you to come out of your room. Everyone is really worried you know.”

Then Ben felt a little bad for lashing out. His brother didn’t mean him any harm, he was probably being affected by Ben’s presentation as an omega too. His whole family was. Ben imagined all the hasty emails and phone calls his father must be dealing with, announcing his son’s unexpected orientation outcome. And then there was the matter of discussing, conversing about it all with everyone in a normal matter, pretending it wasn’t such a huge shock. And Fin was likely being berated by questions about him too—and he hadn’t even seen Ben until now.

He took a breath to calm down.

“Sorry Fin, I didn’t mean to shout. This just really sucks, like a lot. I don’t want to be an omega.”

He hung his head, feeling a wave of self-hatred.

“Mom’s an omega,” Fin interjected, reaching a hand out to rest on his shoulder. “Omegas are different from alphas, but I still like them. Things are just going to be different than you thought, that’s all.”

Now his little brother was comforting him. How low had he sunken? His pride as the alpha big brother used to not allow things like this.

“That’s _not_ all Fin. Different?” he let out a derisive laugh, “I can’t go to the same school anymore. I can’t play sports. I can’t move around freely, there’s a million things I need father’s permission to do. I can’t marry Anabelle.” He listed them in textbook fashion, the realities he’d been trying to ignore. “I feel so pathetic, but how the hell am I supposed to be optimistic about this Fin? How?”

There was a ring of silence.

Fin hesitated, contemplating an answer.

“Anabelle’s father, Mr. Blackwell, came over to speak with father the other day,” he spoke finally.

It was probably attempt at diversion, but it cut Ben right where it hurt most. 

“Probably to brake off our betrothal.” Ben surmised, voice hollow.

Two omegas couldn’t marry; it was unheard of. His and Anabelle’s relationship would be quickly dissolved and swept underneath the rug by their fathers, forgotten along with all the promises Ben had made.  

Fin looked at the floor. He couldn’t tell him he was wrong.

“You and Anabelle can still be friends you know.”

Ben laughed.

“I didn’t want to be friends with her, Fin, I wanted to be mated with her.” He wouldn’t allow Fin to minimalize the situation. “And I don’t think the Blackwells will want me around at all. They’re going to sweep this all under the rug and betroth Anabelle to someone else as soon as they can.”

“T-That’s not true!” Fin stammered.

“Of course it is!” his brother was so naïve.

“Just listen for a sec, okay! They may not let you and Anabelle marry anymore, but that’s not the only thing father and Mr. Blackwell talked about. I’m sure they want you to be friends!”

Ben rolled his eyes. Who cared what else they talked about. Anabelle was literally the only thing that had mattered.

Fin took a deep breath.

“You know how Anabelle has a brother?”

* * *

 

Ben heard his bedroom door slam behind him as he ran down the stairs to the kitchen.

Lungs heaving, catching his breath, he stopped before his father.

“How could you.”

His father put down his coffee cup, caught by surprise.

“--Son?”

“How could you!” he repeated.

His father raised both hands, as if to steady him. “I don’t quite know what you mean Ben. Please, settle down. I’m glad to see you out of your room.”

Ben was having none of this. As if he would just settle down. His father’s calm was infuriating.

“You know exactly what I mean! Fin told me everything!”

“Benjamin,” his father warned, “Don’t raise your voice to me. I think you’ve had enough time to sulk by now; I understand this change is difficult for you, but I’m not going to be so lenient forever. And I won’t accept this disrespectful behavior. If you want to discuss something with me, sit down at the table and ask politely.”

Ben gritted his teeth, fuming. He couldn’t believe this. How could his father expect him to just treat this so casually.

“Benjamin.”

Ben uncurled his fists. His arms hung limp at his sides. He was angry, but he had no choice but to submit to authority. He’d never win against the alpha patriarch.

“Sorry,” he mumbled, bowing his head before sitting down across from his father.

“Good.” His father regarded him with stern approval, taking a sip from his coffee cup. “Now I have an idea, but what is it you are so concerned about son?”

Ben’s hands clutched at his knees underneath the table. He struggled to collect himself.

“Fin mentioned that you were making plans with Mr. Blackwell…plans about…my marriage.” He slowly looked up to make eye contact with his father, hoping, somehow, to be refuted, disproved, for Fin’s words to have all been a misunderstanding.

But there was nothing but confirmation in his father’s gaze.

“Yes, Mr. Blackwell and I have been discussing your new marriage prospects. I’m sure you’ve realized this already, but you will no longer be marrying Anabelle.”

“I know that!” Ben couldn’t help but cut in. “But that doesn’t mean you have to--”

“Benjamin.” His father silenced him. “In normal circumstances, these things would be dealt with in a less abrupt, smoother manner, through gradual negotiations and meetings, and I wish I had been able to do that for you. But now we simply don’t have time. Families of our station arrange marriages for their children from a young age. If I wait too long, there will be no hope of finding you a good match.”

The things his father was saying were all true. They make sense. Ben couldn’t deny the logic of it all. These were all the same reasons he’d been betrothed to Anabelle so early. But he still couldn’t bring himself to accept it.

“What if I just don’t have a mate?”

“That’s out of the question. Not only would it would negatively affect our family reputation, but new laws requiring the transfer of omegas to a mate by age eighteen without a government granted exemption make it almost legally impossible.” His father shut him down instantly.

“Then why can’t I wait a few more years! Or even _a_ year! I’m only thirteen, there’s no reason we have to do it right now, right?”

Ben was pleading now, grasping for something, growing more and more helpless by the word.      

“As I explained before Ben, we can’t afford to wait. More than that, I fear that many families will be reluctant to marry their sons to you, given your upbringing as an alpha. We are extremely fortunate to have received this offer. There may not be another one.”

He tried one last time.

“What if I say no?”

His father looked at him straight in the eyes, almost sympathetic.

“You know you don’t get to say no.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was a difficult chapter to write; there were a lot of emotions to cover, and I'm still not sure what I think about how it turned out :/
> 
> I also wanted to fit Kai in somewhere, but he'll make an appearance in the next chapter.
> 
> Thanks so much for reading:] Any feedback is appreciated!


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for all the feedback and kudos :]  
> This chapter took some time to write--the pacing is kind of terrible--but hopefully you guys can enjoy it :]

It was one of those car rides you hoped would never end.

Ben folded his hands in his lap, fighting the urge to play with his fingers or bite his lip. His heartbeat, pulsing in his ears, accompanied a sick twinge of fear in his stomach too menacing to be described as “the butterflies”.

He wished he could shrug the whole meeting off. He wished he could treat it like he’d treated soccer, just give up trying and bear with it until it the clock ran out. Some of the simulations in his head had played out that route—simulations where he’d been obstinate and sulked, simulations where he’d refused to speak, simulations where he’d expertly pleaded his case and convinced everyone, where his father apologized, where Mr. Blackwell took pity on him.

But he couldn’t afford to act out his brash, childish fantasies this time. Moments of satisfaction could cost him priceless opportunities--could literally mean the ruin of the rest of his life.

He was an omega. Securing a marriage proposal on negotiated terms with a suitor of high social class with economic resources and obligations to his family to treat him well was likely the best-case scenario for him.   

Ben hadn’t been able to reach this conclusion by himself. Just a few days before he’d been intent on foiling his father’s plans.

But Convincing his father of anything on his own was hopeless. He’d already shown that he didn’t have ears for Ben’s pleas.  So Ben had turned to the one thing that might sway his father—his mother.

* * *

 

Dinner was silent that night, the night Ben had learned of his marriage betrothal.

Ben didn’t have the nerve to speak up about any of it, but he also couldn’t bring himself to try to talk about anything else. His father didn’t seem to mind the lack of conversation. Fin appeared a little nervous, twirling his fork, maybe worried that Ben blamed him for the sudden turn of events in his life. Their mother was the calm and collected one in the room. The only words spoken so far had been from her at the beginning of the meal, expressing her happiness that Ben had joined them at the table, kissing him on the forehead and handing him a plate.

His father hadn’t told her yet. He was running away from an unavoidable fight, or maybe just trying to enjoy a moment of peace before a storm.

If there was one thing Ben knew, it was that his mother would not give her son away so easily. And while the thought heartened Ben, it also made him feel guilty and ashamed. Because he knew he would cause more damage to his parent’s relationship.

“Ben, I need to discuss something with you privately after you finish dinner. We’ll go to your room, okay?” his mother broke the silence again, right on cue as Ben was scraping his plate.

His father paused cutting his food to look over at them.

“What will you be discussing dear.”

He was probably half curious, half suspicious. The question didn’t sound like a threat.

His mother waved him off, “nothing that would interest you _dear_.”

That was code for “omega stuff” that was deemed to insignificant for alphas like his father to bother themselves with. His father made some sound of acknowledgement and continued eating.

When the meal was finished and dishes put away, Ben’s mother met him in him room.

The door was shut behind her.

Her expression serious, she ushered Ben to sit across from her on the bedside chair.

“I’ve heard that you are to be betrothed to the Blackwell boy.”

Ben swallowed, hesitant to respond. He wasn’t sure if he wanted to act strong before his mother or fall begging into her arms.

He took a deep breath.

“Mother, I told father I didn’t want to, I-I tried to reason with him, but he won’t listen to me.”

His mother lay a hand on his cheek to calm him, and Ben looked back up at her with pleading eyes. She must’ve known what he was about to ask. Her expression became grim.

“Ben,” she met him with a solemn gaze, “I can’t stop this.”

It wasn’t the reaction he’d expected. He didn’t understand.

“What?” he brushed her hand away, suddenly hurt. “Then why bring it up in the first place? You could! He cares about what you think, really, he might listen!”

How could his mother claim to be on his side when she didn’t even try to fight for him. It was a selfish thought, but Ben didn’t care. He felt betrayed, and for one of the first times in his life he glared at his mother in anger.

She was looking down at the hand he’d rejected.

For a moment, she appeared to waver, but then she turned back to her son with resolution.

“Ben. Before I discuss with you what I came here to discuss, I need you to know something; something you must never forget.”

Though still upset, Ben could only nod.

“Omegas are equal. They are no lesser than alphas or betas or any other human being. No law or dictate, no social norm or custom changes that.”

And Ben had known that. He’d believed it for years. His mother was preaching to the choir, he wanted to say. But he’d needed so much to hear it; so much that all he could do was hold back tears and try to compose himself to receive his mother’s next words.

“But you must also be aware that almost every law, dictate, norm and custom, the government, the people who make up the government, society, the people who make up society will try to convince you of the opposite.”

Of course he’d known that too. Of course he’d known.

“Mom, I know but--”

“No Ben,” she hushed him, “I do think you know, but I don’t think you’ve thought about what it _means_. You’ve never had to, and I wish it could have stayed that way. But you are an omega, and your future is no longer secure in ignorance and inaction.”

He didn’t want to understand what she was about to say.

“I don’t want to marry him! I’ll refuse! I’ll--”

“Ben!”

The tone mirrored that of his father’s, except it was coming out of his mother’s lips. She gripped his shoulders, forcing him to attention.

“You don’t get to be stupid anymore. You don’t get to be brash, to not think. Nothing is promised and everything can be taken away. You must secure all you can for yourself, and right now the only way to do that is from within the system. The system, society, the government all worked in your favor before; I had nothing to teach you. But things have changed. You need to listen to me Ben.”

He nodded, half-stunned, the weight of it all starting to settle.

“A marriage to the Blackwell boy is your best option. On top of financial resources, The Blackwell family has a good relationship and political ties to the Woodhulls. This means we will be able to visit and contact you once you are mated. It also means that the Blackwells will feel a compulsion to at least keep up appearances of your wellbeing. If we turn down this offer, the chances of receiving a better one are low. Worst case scenario, we turn it down and don’t receive another offer at all; then when you turn eighteen you’ll be taken in by the government and assigned to a random alpha who knows where, and you’ll be out of reach from even your father’s influence. You can’t turn down this offer.

“That isn’t to say that all will be well once you accept it. There will be negotiations, your father will hold on to some decision-making power until you turn eighteen; I’m going to do all I can to steer him in the right directions. But after that, when the time comes for you to bond, everything will depend on your mate.”

She brought her line of sight down to Ben, reaffirming his attention, underlining the magnitude of her message.

“I don’t know this boy, and I certainly don’t have all the answers. But it will be better for you if you don’t hate him. It will be dangerous for you if he hates you. Be kind, fulfil your duties. But always keep a distance. Alphas are apt to confuse love with possession.”

Ben immediately made the connection, unthinkingly breaking into his mother’s speech.

“Like father,” he said.

She didn’t respond directly, continuing on with her point.

“When someone loves you, your happiness is their happiness, and your pain their pain. If this is not the case, then it is not love. You can let them pretend it is, you can use it for your benefit, but don’t ever let them fool you Ben.”

She released her grip on his shoulders, her stare lingering on him, gone from severe to pleading.

“Ben, do you understand? I want to do everything for you, but I can’t. I will do what I can, but you must also do what you can. Be present for the negotiations. Be likable. Be amiable. Don’t let them think they need to take further steps to watch, restrain, confine—and then you can take advantage of every right they forget to take from you.”

He nodded slowly, present before his mother, but wanting to run away.

“Ben,” she shook him lightly, “Do you understand?”

“Yeah.”

* * *

 

Ben kept his mother’s words in mind as he sat in the backseat with his father, staring out the window of a car growing ever closer to the Blackwell manor, to the negotiation of his marriage.

The car came to a halt.

The chauffeur circled around to drop them off in the front of the manor and Ben followed behind his father, making his way to the front steps. It was a path he’d taken so many times before in his visits to Anabelle. Ben had never imagined he’d ever walk upon these stones in his current state of mind.

He wasn’t here for Anabelle today.

before reaching the front door, Ben’s father turned to around to examine him, scrutinizing his figure one last time.

“You’ve one too many buttons buttoned Ben. Undo the bottom one. And straighten your tie.”

His father could have offered more encouraging words, but Ben supposed he was worrying about him in his own way. He did as he was told and fixed his fashion faux pas.  

“Good,” his father nodded approvingly. “Now let’s go in. Remember to let me do all the talking. You only need to express understanding and approval of the final terms we set, okay? The Blackwells are our allies. This shouldn’t be too hard.”

Ben nodded. He thought that might have been his father trying to reassure him more than it was a warning to shut up and behave, but he could never be sure.

His father awkwardly patted his head before ringing the doorbell.

Ben stood behind his father, face halfway hidden behind his shoulder when the doors opened for them.

Mr. Blackwell held his hand out to greet his father, ushering them into the house.

And there was Kai, two steps behind, standing back, courteous, in a crisp dark suit, an easy smile on his lips.

Ben averted his gaze to the ground, involuntarily shrinking further behind his father.

He hated it. Ben knew he hated that it had to be anyone, but hated more that it had to be Kai.

He hated that he had to stand on these stone steps again and feel stupid and ashamed and small again.  And how the older boy smiled down on him, light eyes benevolent and kind. This time Ben hadn’t come to make an apology. This wouldn’t end with a rushed request for forgiveness before running off to Anabelle.

 “It’s good to see you Ben.” Kai addressed him, catching his eyes as they flickered up from the ground.

He fought the urge to retract even further behind his father’s back.

“It’s good to see you too.” He lied, voice even, trying to keep his chin up.

Kai blinked, as if caught off guard for a second, before falling back into a smile.

“Now,” Mr. Blackwell moved to announce “since we’ve exchanged greetings, let us head to the living room where we can have this discussion more comfortably.” He motioned for a maid to open the door leading down the hall. “I thought we’d have brunch first before moving on to the formal terms.”

“Come along Ben,” his father nudged him, “stop clinging to my back and go walk with Kai.”

He opened his mouth with an initial instinct to refuse. Why would he do that? But then resigned to his father when he thought about the answer.  With a twitch of annoyance, he stepped over to the older boy, who only smiled as they were led into a grand dining room.

The four of them found seats in the center of a long oak table. Ben quickly sat beside his father. Kai took the seat across from him.

“Negotiating a betrothal can be some nasty business,” Mr. Blackwell began, cutting to the chase. “and I know Ben here received some unexpected, maybe unwelcome news a few weeks ago, but I hope you all are as relieved as I am to be discussing this with a good friend and ally rather than a stranger.” He let out a hearty laugh, “Last time, you remember, I was on the other side of the table.”

His father laughed back. Ben couldn’t bring himself to smile at the reference to Anabelle.

“Yes, I remember,” his father responded good-humoredly. “It was one of the quickest rounds of negotiations I’ve ever experienced. I hope we can get this step over with and the papers signed and sealed in a similar manner this time as well.”

“Then we are in agreement.”

Maids began placing dishes in front of them.

Ben tried to eat despite the nerves suppressing his appetite. He watched as his father and Mr. Blackwell spoke out their diplomatic lines to one another. He wondered silently if the two were friends or just politicians who occasionally scratched eachother’s backs.

He was grateful, for once, of the alpha-dominated dialogue, although it did make him question why he had to show up for this if only to be treated like a ghost. Kai recommended a tart to him and placed it on his plate, but outside of that, he seemed to be understanding towards Ben’s desire to refrain from talking. The older boy involved himself in the adult’s conversation with interest, even drawing smiles from Ben’s father.

As the food disappeared, the brunch, meant to be a separate affair, naturally began to shift into a discussion of the terms for Ben and Kai’s betrothal. There were some gritty details that could make negotiations drag on forever. A set amount of money was often paid to the alpha family from the omega family every year or month from the betrothal until the official marriage. Matters of housing and accommodation before marriage were also key topics. Then there were education and career choices as well as rules to be agreed upon.  

Mr. Blackwell casually brought up the age of marriage to start.

“My mate was sixteen when we married, so we were thinking--”

“Father, Sir.” Kai spoke up before anyone could continue the topic.

Mr Blackwell and Ben’s father paused to turn questioningly to the younger male.

“Son?” Mr. Blackwell asked apprehensively.

“Mr. Woodhull, Father” he addressed the men considerately, “I think Ben and I are finished eating,” his gaze flickered over to Ben, “I was hoping it might be possible to take this opportunity to spend some time alone to get to know one another while you complete the formal negotiations. I took the initiative to discuss the most important terms with my father beforehand.”

Ben didn’t allow the eye contact to last, quickly breaking away to stare at the silverware he’d stupidly set down.

 “Of course, I’ll review your final decisions before signing anything.” Kai smoothed over his proposition.

“I think that sounds like a good idea,” Ben’s father approved.

“Yes, it might be a good chance for you and Ben to talk about things,” Mr. Blackwell followed. “Little Ben was always so caught up in Ana-” he paused, “Well, you know, I think it might be good to talk without us old folks around.”             

Ben didn’t miss the hesitation at Anabelle’s name.

Kai stood up after the maids had cleared away their plates. “Wonderful. Thank you for your understanding. I don’t mean to leave the all the boring details to you, but I don’t see how I could be much help. I hope you don’t mind.”

“Of course not.” Ben’s father replied.

“Come on, let’s go Ben.” Kai held out a hand to help Ben up from his chair.

Ben’s father shot him a warning look when he hesitated to receive it. Kai took his hand before he could extend his deliberation.

So Ben allowed himself to be led away from the negotiation table, confused and irritated, wondering why he had to leave his father. He’d been content to just observe and nod. He didn’t mind boring negotiations. But then he supposed it would be stupid to refuse Kai’s company; this was going to happen eventually, and he’d never had a one on one conversation with Kai before.

 The older boy took him down halls then heading up a flight up steps.

“Negotiations aren’t too fun are they?” Kai smiled back at him. “You’re lucky you got out of yours for your first betrothal, not having presented yet and all.”

Ben flinched at the nonchalant reference to Anabelle, but continued to follow behind.

“I guess.”

He felt awkward. The situation was absurd. The broken proposal to Anabelle. His presentation as an omega. The overall lack of past interaction with Kai aside from a fight on a soccer field. Ben didn’t feel comfortable talking about any of it, and yet, it was also unsettling how none of it was being addressed.

They reached a small room filled with books. Ben had never been in it before. Kai entered the room and motioned for Ben to follow.

“This is my study. I spend a lot of time here. It’s quiet, so I thought it’d be a nice place to talk.” Kai pulled out a chair. “There’s another one over there. You don’t have to sit on the ground.”

Ben pulled out the chair in mention, wondering if Kai had just made a joke.

The door closed, and Ben felt the realization that they were alone.

Kai crossed his legs. Ben folded his arms.

The room was silent. What could they talk about? How could they get to know eachother? Ben wanted to leave.

“Ben” Kai started. Ben could feel him staring at him, and he reluctantly lifted his head to make eye contact.

“…Yes?” he mumbled.

Kai paused for a moment, eyes continuing to focus on him.  As if evaluating him for something, calming measuring him somehow. He seemed to reach a conclusion.

“You know we’re going to be married, right?”

Ben stiffened, sure this was not what he wanted to talk about.

“…I mean, yeah, that’s uh why I’m here.”

Kai smiled as he fumbled over his words.

“I have to say I’m impressed. I’m sure the past weeks have been difficult for you. I expected you to act out. But I guess our past encounters gave me the wrong impression of you.”

Kai appeared to be showing a degree of concern, but something about the wording unsettled Ben.

“I…um…”

Ben mumbled again, not knowing what to say or the safest way to direct the conversation.

In the span of his hesitation the older boy’s smile shifted into a more serious expression.

“Ben. I think it will only be harder for us if we dance around this. You’re only thirteen and you’ve lived your life up until now as an alpha. You were engaged to my sister, an omega, for two years. I’m going to try to be understanding of all that.”

Kai continued before Ben could muster a response.

“ _But_ , I’m also going to be clear about this.”

“About this?”

“I don’t want you to misunderstand what this marriage means for you.” Kai watched Ben wince. “Anabelle threw a fit the day you presented. She thought that you were going to ‘save her’ to ‘make her a politician’. She had every right to be angry, but for different reasons. Involvement in an unnatural relationship with another omega will forever stain her record. My sister’s chances at marriage and happiness are almost ruined.”

“No…I didn’t…Anabelle…” Ben cut in, fighting the urge to plug his ears.

Kai was unrelenting.

“My father hopes to cover up Anabelle’s broken engagement with our marriage; to spin the story into you and I having had the real relationship from the start. I’m aware your father agreed to our marriage with similar motivations. But make no mistake Ben,” he stared directly into his eyes, “Despite all the circumstances, I expect you to fulfil your duties as my omega.”

Ben had already been afraid. He’d been on his best behavior. He was already bearing so much. And now he felt like he was the one being put at fault. Why was Kai telling his this? His tone was so neutral he couldn’t tell if he was angry.

Maybe Ben should have spared more thought for Anabelle. He had worried about her, but he mainly worried about himself. But he couldn’t stand to be lectured and attacked by an alpha like Kai, someone with no means to understand.

“I’m sorry about Anabelle.” Ben took a breath, “I’ll do everything I can for her. Anything I can do.” He clenched his fists, trying to keep a steady voice, knowing full well that his next words were more stupid than bold. “But don’t feel like you have to marry me as a cover up. _I_ don’t have a choice. Don’t pretend like you don’t have a choice. An omega raised as an alpha finding a mate might be difficult, but I come from a family with connections. I’m sure I’ll be fine. Anabelle should be too.”

A string of laughter cut him off.

Ben’s mouth hung open mid-sentence, eyes wide. Kai was laughing.

“W-what…Why is that funny?” he asked, confused, and a little embarrassed.

In a few moments Kai managed to recompose himself, but a half-smile lingered on his lips.

“Oh Ben, you’ve completely misunderstood.” Kai reached out, gently, placing a hand on his cheek, looking directly into his eyes. “I don’t do things I don’t want to do. I don’t have to—I’m aware of that privilege. I wouldn’t marry you if I didn’t want to.” He paused for a second. “Let me rephrase that—I’m marrying you because I want to. See?”

Ben, frozen at the touch of the hand on his cheek, nodded dumbly, not understanding.

When Kai’s hand left, his expression had become serious again.

“What I was saying mainly referred to your fidelity. To your relationship with Anabelle. I’m going to request that you don’t see her anymore.”

There was a pause.

“B-but I’m an omega! Why would it matter! Why would you do that.”

He knew he should check his tone, but he couldn’t help the outburst. To be honest, the idea of being kept away from Anabelle didn’t even surprise him. But he had never imagined it to happen in such explicit terms for such a ludicrous reason.

Kai let out a soft, derisive laugh. “I can’t say that your immediate defiance really inspires my confidence. You’re going to hate what I say next.”

“Well that doesn’t really inspire my confidence.” Ben quipped back. But the statement scared him, as it should.

“I’m sure you know but, Anabelle’s dream is to go to the Fuller Academy for Omegas.”

Kai didn’t really need to finish his explanation. He hadn’t lied. Ben hated what he was saying. And he wanted to lash out as it dawned on him. He tried to honor his mother’s words, but more and more Ben was remembering the feeling of his fists smashing into the older boy’s face.

“Please don’t.” He spoke quietly, hands clutching his knees, eyes turned toward the floor.

Kai mimicked sympathy, reaching out to stroke Ben’s shoulder, but his voice was too calm to convince him of the presence of any real compassion.

“I’m not saying I wouldn’t send you there. I honestly wouldn’t mind having a mate go to the top omega school in the nation.” He leaned in closer to catch Ben’s hooded gaze. “What I’m saying is that both of you can’t go.”

Ben smacked Kai’s hand away.

He supposed there was always the possibility of his education being stolen from him. But this was too cruel. The Fuller Academy was famous as the only Omega school offering advanced tracks in math, science, and law. It was bestowed with a special government grant to allow offerings of college credit courses. It was where he had promised to send Anabelle before. It had now become his own shrivel of hope for his future.

“Why would you decide that? If you’re afraid you need to do something to ‘subdue’ me, to weed out my alpha upbringing, then don’t worry! I’ve already accepted that I’m an omega, I didn’t have a choice! And I already know I can’t marry Anabelle!” He was shaking, leaning towards Kai aggressively. “I only ever kissed her once! I-I’ll never kiss her again! Don’t do that to me! Please!”

Kai calmly observed his outburst.

“Ben. I understand that you think this is unreasonable, but I promise you, ask any other alpha and they’d be in my full agreement. It’s outside of your comprehension, but,” he placed a hand back on his shoulder. Ben wanted to tear it off. “I can’t stand the idea of you betraying me. You’re lucky Anabelle is my sister.”

Ben would’ve laughed if he weren’t so close to ripping his own hair out. Had Kai thought that meant anything to him. They weren’t mates yet. Kai hadn’t even given him a second glace until today. Nothing justified pushing him into this kind of decision. He couldn’t hold back his frustration.

“I was supposed to make you like me today, but it’s impossible. I already can’t stand you.”

Ben glared at the hand on his shoulder menacingly. Kai removed it, but only to pat Ben’s head.

“No worries, I already like you.”  

He stood up, pulling a reluctant Ben to his feet along with him.

Ben tore his hands away, but Kai retook them, and looked down into his eyes.

“Ben, your decision. I’ll have to tell our father’s when we go back down to finish the negotiations.” He ran a hand through Ben’s hair. “I wish I could have given you more time.”

All of his protests had been dismissed. Funny how empty the right to make a decision is when you don’t get to choose the decisions you get to make. There was a gun to his head, but there were still two choices, and whatever the outcome, it was now his responsibility, his onus to regret.

And now he knew what a horrible person he really was. He’d thought he was such a white knight before when he’d had the luxury. But deep down he was selfish, self-seeking, and egotistical, willing to trample over others to get what he wanted.  

Because he hadn’t thought for a second that he’d step down for Anabelle.

“Ben?” Kai called him.

“I want to go.” Ben felt a sob in his throat.  “Not Anabelle. Send me.”

He leaned forward, clutching at his shirt in an effort steady his breathing. But tears were already falling from his eyes. He gasped for breath. He was so angry and sad. At everyone and now at himself. He didn’t want to go anywhere.

Ben fell to his knees, sobbing unintelligently.

“Shhh, shhh,” Kai hushed him softly, patting his head as if to comfort him. “It’s done. It’s okay.”

It was stupid, but Ben had no one else to turn to.

Crying, kneeling on the ground, he hugged his arms around Kai’s legs, pushing his face, wet with hot tears, into the fabric of his trousers.  

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading :] Any and all feedback is appreciated.
> 
> Not going to lie, I felt pressure writing this chapter because it was the first time I really had to write Kai...hope I didn't disappoint :/


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter mainly covers a 4-5 year time skip. It wasn't fun to write, and I tried to avoid writing it, but no matter how much I tried I felt like I needed to give a least some idea of what happened after the betrothal. So, needless to say, this wasn't my best! But hopefully things will get more exciting next chapter ;)

“What are you doing?”

He questioned sweetly, looming over him as he straightened his tie.

“Funny, I was just wondering the same thing. Why did you just throw my suit on the bed.”

The other man responded with a tone of annoyance, glaring accusatorily sideways at the pile of clothing that had just been set beside him.

“We’re going to a wedding today remember? One of my interns is getting married. The senator’s son?” he explained amiably, nudging the other man to get ready. When he received no response, he sighed and continued, “The kids are already taken care of. There’s no excuse this time. I know you didn’t forget anyway.”

There was no response.

“Why do you do this? All you have to do is stand next to me. It’s a kid’s wedding celebration for god’s sake! Pick your battles!” the man’s obstinate behavior began to frustrate him.

 But the man remained silent, eyes turned towards the floor.

He seemed to rethink his approach, softening his tone, “Please, love, I hate having to make you.” He knelt on floor beside him to look up into his eyes, lightly caressing his cheek with his fingertips. When the man stubbornly turned away, he placed a soft kiss on his kneecap before lifting his head once more to face him. “Please.”

The man scoffed, still refusing eye contact.

“Hah. Please go, or please go without me forcing you to? I told you since the beginning that that’s not how this works. I’m never going to make things easier for you than I have to.  So never expect me to.” He suddenly locked eyes with the man at his feet, gaze cold and steady. “I owe you nothing.”

After some seconds pause he cracked a smile, rising back to his feet, brushing off his trousers.

“hahaha, believe me I haven’t forgotten.” He caressed the man’s cheek again, “I’m only thinking of your happiness. Think of what you could do with all of the energy you waste resisting.”

The man surprisingly didn’t reject his hand.

“You don’t have the right to talk about my happiness.”

He let his hand drop and crouched down to take the man up in his arms.

“Love,” he shushed, “It’s just a wedding. I know you hate them and the mating ceremony and everything they represent. But there will be a lot of important people in attendance at this one. Both parties come from political families. The omega’s mother is Clarissa Woodhull, one of your old supporters. Remember her? I’ll even let you speak with her. C’mon I’ll help you get dressed.”

He stood the man up as he felt his resistance weaken, still having to take it upon himself to support the majority of his body weight. 

“I’m sure she never wanted to see her child suffer this fate.” The man spoke blankly, barely noticing as he worked to unbutton his shirt.

“Thankfully, not everyone sees marriage and bonding as suffering.” He responded, knowing the man wouldn’t entertain the idea for a second.

“If he’s smart like his mother he will though.”

He sighed, working his partner’s arms out of his shirt, “I’ll never regret making you mine, Locke; I’ll take responsibility for your suffering, but I’ll never regret it.”

“I pray to god your little protégé isn’t half as egotistical and self-righteous as you are.”

He finished dressing him in his pressed dress shirt and started to move to unfasten his trousers.

“He sent his betrothed to study at the Fuller Academy and allowed him to graduate out of the law track, so I do have to admit we’re a bit similar.”

Locke narrowed his eyes, unimpressed, as Theo knelt down again to help him out of his trousers.

“Don’t give yourself credit for my education.”

“I wouldn’t dare,” he acquiesced with a laugh, “Just saying we both appreciate a beautiful mind.”

Locke frowned before kicking his trousers off, snatching the folded pair from the bed; a sudden change of direction, a rag doll brought to life.

“Don’t pretend you care about my mind. You chose my body remember?”

Theo was used to his sharp words. He walked up behind him with his jacket and tie, the final touches to the outfit.

“I like to think I chose your heart.” He got no reaction when he kissed his cheek from behind. Locke allowed him to put him arms through the jacket, holding his arms out, but Theo wasn’t foolish enough to take his silence as agreement.

He placed his hands atop Locke’s shoulder’s, flipping him around to face him so he could properly button his jacket and fasten his tie. Just being near his mate made his heart beat faster, filled him with warmth and satisfaction. The man before him was so perfect, so beautiful. He wanted to undress him again, to kiss him all over, to caress his skin.

Locke’s expression was tired. They argued often. Locke usually won, but he could never actually win.

If only he could understand how much Theo loved him.

* * *

Today he would be wed.

Over four years had passed since their betrothal.

Since he’d turned thirteen and presented as an omega, Ben’s life had changed completely. But because he had been betrothed to Kai almost immediately after coming to age, looking back, it was hard to differentiate the changes that came from living as an omega and those springing from his relationship with Kai. His betrothal to Kai had been a direct consequence of presenting as an omega, so he supposed it didn’t matter much anyway.

Ben had been allowed to continue living with his parents in the Woodhull household until their marriage.  He, of course, had also been obligated to visit Kai once a week, as well as attend important events with him as his betrothed.

They had usually met at the Blackwell manor, in the study where Ben and Kai had first been alone together. To Ben’s confusion, and fortune, Kai had rarely spoken to him about their future bond in as explicit terms as he had that first day. Despite the hours they spent together every week, Kai had very much returned to the smiling enigma he had existed as before.

They did speak to each other; about current events, books, family affairs—never anything risky or bold on Ben’s part. Sometimes they’d just sit and read silently. Both of them were absorbed in their studies-- Kai on a whole different level, especially since his graduation. He worked as an intern at parliament while also taking college courses from the most prestigious alpha university. There were weeks when Ben felt like just another tick in the alpha’s schedule.

Ben had managed to get as much out of the Fuller Academy as he could. The material was biased and the text lacking, aimed at omegas hoping to work aside their mates as paralegals or office assistants. Through the years his class sizes had dwindled as classmates dropped out after betrothals or marriages were decided. There were a few omegas there he found to be similar to himself; upperclassmen he looked up to and peers he admired.  Sadly, while some of them belonged to more liberal families by marriage or blood, many failed to graduate, pulled out as soon as an alpha in charge had changed their mind about educated omegas.

The government had also gotten much stricter with omega education and organization; they feared that omega movements like those that had grown out of omega centers years before would root in other omega institutions if left unwatched. Therefore, Ben had had fewer chances to get to know his classmates than he would’ve liked. There were no afterschool activities and few spaces where they could speak uninhibited.

It had taken time for Ben to see himself as enough of an omega to be truly capable of identifying with and understanding the oppression they faced; but once he had gained it, he found himself falling to the sad conclusion that this understanding had no productive place to go, no means of use. He was just as trapped as the rest of them.

Invisible walls stood between omegas themselves, fortified and built up by fear and indoctrination. Some omegas, he had learned, were already lost to the norms of society, content with their positions underneath their alpha mates, wishing for nothing more than marriage and children. Ben didn’t know whether he felt pity or contempt for them. Then there were omegas like his mother, who retained silent resistance while living in society’s norms, too smart to raise their voices.

Ben thought he could pick them out, the silent resistance. They communicated their dissatisfaction with slight eye movements and sideways comments when introduced by their overbearing mates at social outings, part of a secret language between omegas. He figured any omega at Fuller Academy who worked hard had to be at least somewhat awake, but the academy was more heavily monitored than private spaces, so few were stupid enough to actually voice discontent.

The closest he’d come, Ben recalled, to hearing direct discontent had occurred at the beginning of his first term. During a break period one day, before he’d really adjusted, a girl had approached him. She’d said she’d heard about him, how he’d lived as an alpha until recently. And she’d asked about a million questions about it, about being an alpha, the freedoms, the privileges. Ben had enjoyed answering, weaving in hidden criticism and cynicism into his replies. And he’d made his first friend—but she’d dropped out two years later after getting married.

Too many of his friendships ended this way, dissolving away with no hope of contact. Even if Ben was able to get his hands on contact details, they would almost definitely only be for a guardian alpha or mate, which was close to useless. Ben had a hand-held phone to contact his home, Kai, or the police/ambulance in an emergency, but other than that it was garbage for anything else. In most cases, all Ben could hope for was that they didn’t move far away and happened to be in that same social circles as the Blackwell family; that gave him a chance of being able to make harmless small talk while their alphas draped an arm around their shoulders and sipped wine. 

There were countless aspects of omegahood which terrified Ben. It had turned his world upside down. But he’d never imagined the extent of the loneliness it forced upon him. He could no longer freely connect with the world—with other omegas or alphas. He felt oppressed, suppressed, secluded into his own mind, and there was no one, no place safe to vent to, no one to offer validation to his suffering, that he was indeed suffering, that this was indeed all fucked up. He had his mother, but soon she too would be separated from him once he was married.

He thought about how once he had been able to provide that validation to someone, before he’d turned out to be an omega. But he knew it would be stupid and dangerous to try to receive it from an alpha. It was safest to assume they were all complicit. Ben knew that Kai knew something of his beliefs regarding omega equality, though he’d never directly confronted him about it, but Kai had never shown any sign of where he stood on the issue. He seemed more liberal than others, but he still stayed within societies lines.

Kai had been supportive of Ben’s education overall. He’d kept his promise and sent him to the Fuller Academy, and had never once suggested for him to quit. He’d allowed Ben to spend much of their time together reading and writing. He’d lend Ben books from his study if he asked. A couple times Ben had been too afraid to borrow higher-level economics and history books outright, and had attempted to read them surreptitiously, but Kai had always taken notice, then pulled his cheek or flicked his forehead and told him to ask properly.

The only time Ben had honesty feared he’d angered Kai was when he was sixteen and Kai was eighteen and about to go off to college. At the time, Ben hadn’t had access to an unrestricted computer in years. Kai kept his computer in his study, but it was kind of implicit that he couldn’t use it. It was rare and “dangerous” to expose omegas to the internet. The computers at school were heavily monitored and could only access pre-approved sites.

Kai had finally bought a laptop right before college. And it wasn’t as if the thought had popped into his head immediately to take it. It had always been a stupid idea. But when a chance arose when Kai left to use the bathroom and the laptop had been left unused in his bag, Ben had rushed, unthinkingly to replace it with a similarly weighted textbook while hiding the real item away in his own bag.

That night he’d spent hours searching for Locke’s old forum posts and articles. They were nowhere to be found. He didn’t know what he’d been thinking anyway. He hadn’t had a printer. He would’ve had to write them all out on loose-leaf paper. He hadn’t known what else to do with his golden opportunity. He’d known that Kai would be able to trace back everything he’d done.

Luckily, the burden of that decision had disappeared when his father found him. His father had been furious. It’d reminded him of the old days when he’d disappoint his father as his alpha heir.

The next day he’d been driven over to the Blackwell’s manor to return it.

Ben had reminisced about his forced apology on the stone steps. But this time had been different. This time, his father hadn’t forced him to apologize. No. After the laptop was handed over to an employee, his father had simply left him there.

And in a few seconds, he had learned why.

Kai slapped him, open handed on the steps.

It was the first act of violence Kai had ever taken against him, and soon after he’d pulled Ben into a hug.

“I told you to just ask. Idiot.” He’d said.

But more than the shock and the sting on his cheek, what had hit Ben was the reality of their relationship. His father hadn’t left him to apologize. His father had left him to be disciplined. Because Ben had become less of his father’s responsibility. Soon he would be Kai’s.

The realization had angered and scared him. Would he not only become Kai’s mate, but his child as well?

Kai was two years older than him, so to a degree, especially at first, he did treat Ben like a child--in some ways that Ben found condescending and annoying and in other ways that he was, in contrast, thankful for.

Kai hadn’t properly kissed Ben until he was fifteen. Ben had continued taking suppressants throughout the years and wouldn’t stop until they were properly married, as per tradition. His first heat, and sexual experience, would be on his wedding night.

Ben wasn’t so naïve as to believe that Kai was as chaste as he was. He knew their kisses and caresses weren’t enough to satisfy an alpha.  

The depths of an alpha’s lust were something Ben had unfortunately had to learn from his own little brother.

Finn, once his sweet, stupid little brother, had presented as an alpha, fulfilling familial expectations, unlike himself. The change hadn’t been immediate, but slowly and surely a rift had emerged in their brotherhood. Ben no longer felt like an older brother; instead he had become an omega sibling. They lived under the same roof, but in totally separate worlds. Sure, he and Finn interacted, they saw each other, but the interconnecting points in their lives had become fewer and fewer.

Also unlike Ben, Finn excelled at sports, winning a position on their districts youth soccer team. To the frustration of his father, who pushed his heir to focus on his studies, he spent most of his time practicing with his teammates.

Every once and a while Finn would bring them over to the house. Ben, of course, being betrothed, was discouraged from speaking with other alpha’s in private settings without his alpha present. But he could hear their voices through his bedroom wall, talking about omegas, fantasizing about how they wanted to fuck them, bragging about highly-exaggerated experiences.

Lower class omegas were more free in a sense. The pressure for marriage into a good family wasn’t there, and while purity until marriage was encouraged for all omegas, the government didn’t put too much effort into keeping lower classes celibate. Many alphas wanted to fool around before--and during--marriage; turning a blind eye to sexual relations with lower class omegas allowed alphas to satiate their sexual needs as well as protect upper class omegas from becoming ‘tainted’ before marriage. Ben had been vaguely aware of this reality, but hearing the lewd words out of boys even younger than himself was jarring.  

And Finn was as bad as the rest of them. Ben wondered if the conversations would go differently if Finn knew he could hear, but then also questioned if that really mattered. One time, one of Finn’s friends had brought up Ben, saying lewd things about his body, asking jokingly if Finn would let him have a go. Finn had just laughed it off, warning that his brother was already betrothed. “You’d have to ask Kai Blackwell for that, not me. And I think he’d rip your dick off.” Ben had plugged his ears before he could hear anymore.

But he’d also wondered why chastity was so important. So far, Ben had no reason to believe that Kai loved him. He didn’t doubt that Kai had some affection for him—he’d believed it when he’d told him he liked him. Overall though, Ben felt more like a puppy than a lover. Kai didn’t look at him with the longing and desperation his father sometimes looked at his mother with. When his hands brushed his shoulders, they weren’t clinging or reaching.

Not that he was sure what his father had for his mother was love, but he thought at least it was the closest he’d even seen of it. But then he really had no idea. Did he have any model for love between alpha and omega that wasn’t twisted?

Anyway, Ben’s father needed his mother in some way, and he feared her rejection to the point of disregarding her freedom. Kai did not show this fear. He moved around him with steady confidence.

Ben wondered whether that was good or bad.

Would it change after today. tonight.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! As always, any feedback is appreciated :]


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